Who's bitch am I anyways?

Okay dogs let's get this sorted out.

When I come to the park I come to play. That means run, jump, wrestle and have fun. Did you notice that bit? Have fun.

Now call me old fashioned, but I do not go to the park to be passed from big dog to big dog as their park bitch. You'd think I was a prison inmate this morning! Just because I am well groomed, athletic and lean doesn't mean I want some great slobering beast mounting me!

And come on dogs; stop, drop and roll should be enough to get you off my back, but when you get the death grip on me and won't release?

I've got two words for you, "thera pee".

You guys need help, professional help.

The Gaffer PHD (pretty hound dog)