Shreddie & Lawn Mower Lucy

The Vancouver Police Departement K9 unit has concluded its investigation into the events of Wednesday June 7, 2006. The report has recommended the case be closed as it was apparently all due to a blond moment by Eddie's mom.

So here is my version, which I will consider more accurate than anyone else's as I was there. Admittedly I was playing deep left field by myself, but that is irrelevant as far as I am concerned because it is all about me.

So there we were in the park around 7:30 am; Eddie, Lucy, Robbie and me. Eddie's mom had the ball in one of those throwing things that makes it go real far and real fast. They're cool. So Katherine (Eddie's mom) winds up and pitches the ball. It was a beautiful throw with lots of distance. The only problem was the ball was heading right in front of a Vancouver Parks and Recreation tractor / lawn mower / assault vehicle driven by some dude in a purple and red lumber jacket from the 80's. So off they go, the three musketeers tearing across the soon to be mowed grass in pursuit of the ball.

This is what they call a cliff hanger, something exciting is going on and the story is interrupted! How infuriating, but as I am in charge it is fun! After all it is all about me...

Back to our story. When last we saw our heros, Lucy and Eddie were on a mission as they are both ball OCD doggers. Not that there is anything wrong with that. It's not like they eat poo...
Robbie on the other paw got distracted and deviated badly.

Speaking about disorders, you should see the bite on my neck! It's like a huge hicky or a zit, eee-ew! I think I got it when a certain dogger whose initials are L.U.C.Y. was hanging off my face and neck like cheap costume jewelry while we wrestled yesterday morning. Nice... My monkey is taking me to the vet to make sure it is okay. Even thought I wasn't keen on the idea, he gently cleaned it and put on some mild antibiotic cream. Usually I clean things like that myself, but the angles were all wrong unless my tongue was 20 cm longer. Now there's a weird thought.

Okay, so Eddie and Lucy hurtle just in front of the mower and Lucy snags the ball in mid flight and the two of them carve a graceful arc back to the pack as if there was nothing wrong. I don't think they even saw the mower!

All this while Eddie and Lucy's moms are a little freaked out and lawnmower man cruises on listening to Megadeath or something similar. I bet he had the volume on 11/10.

Case closed.