My pack lady read me your latest blog about your diet and I thought I’d better set you straight about your people management skills.
You are a retriever, that means that you have to collect things both edible and inedible and deliver them to your pack guy.
Now I can understand that if something is too gross to eat you need to make a point to your pack people, but really, hiding raw fish under your monkey’s butt is not the way to go. Instead you should have deposited the object gently in his lap, lightly covered in slobber and then given him “The Look”. As in,
“How could you think that I would consider eating this object? Are you so insensitive to my feelings that you would inflict this thing upon me? I am so disappointed in you!”.Guilt is a major training technique to be applied to your pack people. We retrievers spend years perfecting our sad faces so that we can get our pack people on the right track. As for fish, I’m not allowed raw fish anymore. Could this be because of the dead fish I found at our beach last summer? So I indulged in a bit of rolling around in dead fish? Does that mean I had to have a bath? Swimming is good, baths are very, very bad. All that carefully acquired environmental odour, gone in a blast of bubbles. My pack lady has no concept of what it means to be a real dog.
Good luck training your pack people, I’m sure you’ll have them feeding you the right stuff soon. Remember if they slip up just work on your Look and all should be well.
Diva!
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